Just now I was texting Friend A regarding the chalet and her birthday celebration stuff. Trying to gather people to help her to celebrate her birthday and then we raised to the photo taking issue.

The story goes like this:

One Sunday I promised DH to be his model for some photo shots but in the end I could not wake up because I was sick two days before that. Then A went to replace me as the model. I didn’t know that till DH told me later, wanted to say thank you and sorry to her but had kept forgotten till just now. So, as usual I thank her and said sorry for the troubles caused though inside my heart I thought she had enjoyed the process she desired for. Then she said her boyfriend, B, wanted to call me and scold me for letting A to replace me that day! I was, honestly, quite pissed off at that. Scold me!? Who is him to do that to me? It is not the first time he had mentioned that he wanted to scold me though I know we are all friends and he will not really scold me. But why? What right do you possess to scold me as and when you like? I am not your maid or just a dog waiting to be reprimanded any time.

Dardar had NEVER mentioned about scolding A when I complained things to him. He has always been gently asks me to forgive and forget my good friend. Then while I was texting A, I sent out an SMS to B too, to clarify the matter.

I told B that it is not an obligation for her to replace me that morning. And I know that we both wanted to go initially due to the upcoming test the next morning that’s why she decided to go the next round. So even if she really went with the thought of replacing me, she has the interest in mind too? Am I right? I don’t say she deserves all these or to blame her, but at least, she ought not blame me solely for the “hardship” she had undergone. She will have to go through that if she goes the next round, true? So does it also mean that every time when I can’t attend something she has to replace me and in the end throw all the blames on me? Come on, this is really not the matured way of handling things, it’s like, she had the choice isn’t it? I didn’t ask her to go and I didn’t know she sees it a pain going then. After DH told me that A replaced me, I was still thinking that A must have enjoyed it since we both love photo-taking. So if this is what I assume, would you expecting me to say thank you or sorry to her?

I am grateful yes, but not to be blamed like what B said. I just told my points to B, not blaming A or what-so-ever, but guess what did B say?

B: “You are lucky that you didn’t go, because she has suffered all these for you yet deserved nothing…”

ME: “How can you call that “hardships” when we both love photo taking… And I didn’t know that she is going on behalf of me... even if she did, what are you expecting in return? Isn’t the photos the only output we are looking for??. ”

B: “Ok, A is stupid to go with DH, Feel so sad for her to have this kind of friend like you… She is the most stupid girl I have seen in my life.”

I was totally offended by that.

What does he mean by a friend like me? Then I told Friend C, who knows all of us, even C also think that the way A and B handle things are weird and that B is busybody and too much to say that! None of my friends leaves that kind of comment before, and that’s enough to make me sad for the whole night. Just nice Friend D called, I told him about this, he said guys who scold women are not gentlemen, especially one who scolds the friend of his girlfriend. D suggested something that I think quite logical, that A must have told B many bad things of me for him to say want to scold me..

If this is how B handles things to protect his girlfriend, then I have nothing but to say that I feel sad for A to have such a boyfriend like him!

Perhaps, I am the most stupid girl to scold Dardar when he just said something negative but small about A two years ago;

Perhaps, I am the most stupid girl to still defend for A when my friends said that she is old fashioned;

Perhaps, I am the most stupid girl who helps her to find a part time job for her holiday;

Perhaps, I am the most stupid girl, who still plans hard for her upcoming birthday…

Perhaps, I am just STUPID!

I had no mood now, to still celebrate her birthday, but I know well that A is not really to be blamed. Perhaps, none is to be blamed, because after all, this is just a small thing. I treat A as my good friend yet her boyfriend can say this type of words to me. I felt so hurt, seriously. Well, the things about A and I are really very open, almost all of our friends know. I know maybe is her boyfriend spoils our relationship like what others mentioned, but I hope no more unhappiness please. E used to say that A has changed after being together with B, guess we all agree because B likes to get involved with our girls’ stuffs and we girls don’t like it. And also they said A didn’t reply their sms-es as often after going steady. I don’t know about this as I know A still replies to my sms-es most of the time. But one thing I have observed, I have more minor conflicts with A after B is around. I don’t know what does it say, but certainly, we are no longer as closed though I still regard her as my best friend and sister as before.

What about you A?

Dardar just called me ask me not to be sad over this, he taught me to see things in another angle, taught me to treat this as a small thing which we can just FORGIVE and FORGET, taught me to treasure friendship, taught me to be grateful to people’s negative remarks so that we can learn and grow from this.